Disposable Lives

Once upon a time, things were meant to last.  When you bought furniture, it was understood that it would most likely be the last piece of this you would ever need.  Oh, sure, you might buy another, but it was because the style had changed, not that the piece had fallen apart.

Photo by banjo d
Photo by banjo d

A lot of things were like that.  Hell, pretty much everything was like that.  It was just how things were.

Then one day, some executive figured out that they could sell a lot of something if it was disposable.  Take paper plates, for example.  This exec realized that paper plates were awfully convenient since you used and, rather than washing them, you threw them out.  This is attractive to consumers, and the paper plate companies like it because you’ll keep on buying paper plates rather than simply using the regular plates you already have.

Now, that’s not a big deal.  Might not be the smartest financial decision one could make, but it’s a balance between expense and the time it takes to wash dishes, a chore no one really enjoys.

Where the problem comes in is that somewhere along the way, everything became disposable.  In this day and age, even marriage is disposable. Continue reading “Disposable Lives”

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What Men Aren’t

I’ve been guilty of present masculinity as rather one dimensional as of late, and that’s not good.  So far, it’s hard to tell whether I’m talking about men in most of my posts, or the Terminator.  I get that.

Photo by Policedriver2
Photo by Policedriver2

Today, I’m going to balance that a bit by talking about what men aren’t.

Every day, you’ll see guys kidding one another about turning in their “man card.”  They’ll say real men do this, or real men do that.  As a result, guys who are shunning every aspect of masculinity possible are also declaring what real men do.  Honestly, it’s confusing.

However, real men aren’t worried about some things, and I don’t care what your friends say about it. Continue reading “What Men Aren’t”

Disposable Marriages

I’ve done some thinking about Brian Holcomb’s excellent guest post on Saturday.  When he and I were talking prior to that post being written, I made the comment that my wife’s sticking with me through all the crap we’ve been through actually made her hotter than Kate Beckinsale to me.

Photo by Ben Stephenson
Photo by Ben Stephenson

I did some thinking as to why that is, and I think I’ve hit on it.

You see, in this day and age, guys are bombarded by stories of women bolting from the marriage after the guy loses his job, or of leaving their husband for someone who makes more money, and so on.  It’s terrifying to think that someone you swore to spend your whole life with is really only looking for a paycheck.

The thing is, my wife has been with me when I was literally making nothing.  She was there when my business collapsed.  More importantly, she stayed.   Continue reading “Disposable Marriages”

Guest Post: A Love Letter To Wives (Especially Mine)

The following is a guest post by my friend, Brian Holcomb.  It spawned out of a conversation he and I were having about wives.  In the first paragraph, he notes that it may seem weird for a post like this to be on a blog like this, but I’m going to say that if you don’t feel this way about your wife, the way Brian and I feel about our wives, you need to do some serious self-reflection.

Photo courtesy of Flashback Tunisie
Photo courtesy of Flashback Tunisie

This may seem a little strange and personal especially for a guest post on a masculinity blog, but after talking with Tom the other night, I have some thoughts that have to be shared.  The fact is, every man, the real men that I’ve known, not the players, assholes, and douchebags but the real men have felt this way about the women they love most and I’ve recently been able to articulate it a little better I think than most of us usually can, so here goes.

Being a woman is hard.  We men get a lot of grief over being competitive, but we pick things to compete over and we’re loud about it.  Who’s the best golfer?  Who’s the best rifle shot?  Who’s the best shotgunner?  Who’s the best deer hunter?  Who built the fastest car?  Guys can answer these questions about their group of friends without effort because that’s what we do.  Women on the other hand, whether they talk about it or not compete with each other about everything.  They’re always comparing themselves to the other ladies around them and to the images they’re presented in media.  Continue reading “Guest Post: A Love Letter To Wives (Especially Mine)”

Men And Women Alike Are Shunning Relationships…And We Can Stop It

Relationships are tough.  Anyone who has been in one knows how tough they can be.  It’s also not unusual for someone who has just gotten out of a relationship to want to take a bit of a break before delving into the waters of long-term companionship.

Photo by Don Hoang
Photo by Don Hoang

Unfortunately, a number of people of both sexes are opting to forgo real relationships in exchange for virtual ones.

More and more Japanese millennials are opting for virtual relationships over real ones. That’s right, instead of dating a human being, they’re dating their favorite film or anime character, even a meme or character in a video game. It’s a cultural trend that’s sparked the creation of a multi-million dollar “virtual romance industry” in Japan. And it has Japanese sociologist Masahiro Yamada rather frightened for his country’s future.

However, it’s not just Japan that’s having these issues.  Not by a long shot. Continue reading “Men And Women Alike Are Shunning Relationships…And We Can Stop It”

Letters To My Son: Life and Love

The following is a guest post by Jonathan LaForce, a former Marine, and current entrepreneur.  These letters are to his young son and are things he wishes had been passed down to him.  Since he and I have similar views about what it means to be a man, I’m more than happy to share them.

My dearest boy,

Photo by Erik
Photo by Erik

I’m writing this letter, sitting on the side of a mountain. Full dark has come, the wind is howling. It’s lonely up here, the way I like it. When I was a teen, people came to this place as a lover’s lane. Probably still do. I go here for the quiet. Nobody to bother me. In some ways, that is the story of my life a preference for loneliness. Lonely won’t hurt you. Continue reading “Letters To My Son: Life and Love”

Life In The Friend Zone

Picture by Cali4beach
Picture by Cali4beach

Yesterday, I was talking with a friend of mine about being in the friend zone.  This friend, a woman, has a male acquaintance she was once dating until he dropped everything to whisk his bestest bestie (another woman) off on a trip after the bestest bestie was going through some “stuff”.

It turns out, this guy is actually stuck in the friend zone with his bestest bestie, who he’s apparently in love with.

For the last decade or so, he’s languished there in the hopes that the situation will change and she’ll welcome him into her heart.  To that hope, I have but one thing to offer:

Never.  Gonna.  Happen.

Continue reading “Life In The Friend Zone”