Men don’t like to talk about their problems. While some feminists will see this as a sign of so-called “toxic masculinity,” there are reasons why men are this way, and trying to chalk this up to the mythical Patriarchy is nothing but a waste of time when there are more important aspects of this issue to be discussed.
I’ve maintained that men are stoic, that they don’t sit around and tell everyone their problems and talk about their feelings.
Needless to say, I stand by that.
However, it has never been my contention that men shouldn’t ever talk about any of that.
Men are far more likely to die by suicide than women, and while we can talk until we’re blue in the face about why that’s the case, the causes are less important right now that the solution.
When men are feeling depressed, or having anxiety issues, or any other mental health issues, they need treatment.
Unfortunately, for right or wrong, men are also not likely to talk to counselors and actually get the help they need. I’ve maintained that it’s because men naturally distrust sharing personal information with people they don’t have the utmost trust.
If that is remotely accurate–and I know it is for some men from first-hand information–I need to point out a few facts about the mental health industry.
Counselors are required by law to keep your personal stuff personal. Their own professional standards required it previously, but HIPAA has made it illegal for them to violate those standards.
What does that mean? It means it’s illegal for them to violate your trust.
The same is true for your medical doctor, so if medication is needed you can speak with them as well. In fact, it’s true for anyone along the line in your treatment.
You can trust them to keep quiet.
Now, that doesn’t mean that they won’t be a bad fit, but if that’s the case, you simply look around for a better one. Your doctor can probably make a recommendation for you.
Men have three roles they need to uphold within their family: The provider, the protector, and the professor.
How can you fulfill these roles if you’re not around any longer to take care of your family?
You can’t, so man up and get some help if you’re having problems. There’s no shame in it. Hell, I’d argue that there’s far more shame in running from your problems rather than dealing with them outright.